Why You Might Have Hit A Plateau In Your Career And What To Do About It

By the time professionals reach mid to senior level roles, many of the behaviours that helped them rise begin to lose their effectiveness. What used to be strengths can turn into blind spots, and well-honed habits can start to backfire. This shift is especially pronounced when viewed through the lens of gendered socialization and conditioning. The traits men and women are encouraged to develop, and rewarded for early in their careers, can become the very behaviours that hold them back from top-tier leadership.

In other words: what got you here won’t get you there (Marshall Goldsmith wrote a book with this title expanding on this subject, although the book is more relevant to male leaders).

The transition from subject-matter expert or high-performing team lead to strategic senior leader requires more than just additional skills. It requires a fundamental shift in how you as a professional see yourself, how you relate to others, and how you define leadership. This plays out differently for women and men as I discuss below.

Women: The Trap of Over-Competence and Over-Accommodation

Behaviour That Helped Them Rise

Many high-achieving women rise through the ranks by excelling at what’s often expected of them, namely, being reliable, meticulous, collaborative, and helpful. From their earliest roles, they’re often praised for being accommodating and cooperative, the ones who follow through, support others, and go above and beyond without making waves.

They become the team players who say yes to extra work, who double-check details, who maintain harmony in meetings and deliver high-quality results with consistency. These behaviours earn trust, admiration, and early promotions.

When It Starts to Hurt

Ironically, the very strengths that propelled them forward can, over time, trap them in a cycle of over-functioning. Their competence is recognised, but not necessarily their leadership potential. Their dedication is admired, but not seen as visionary. And because they tend to under-communicate their achievements and avoid self-promotion, their impact can go unnoticed.

What’s more, many women are socialised to avoid conflict, seek approval, and prioritize relationships, which can make it hard to challenge ideas, set boundaries, or take up space in high-stakes rooms. The result is that they are seen as dependable contributors rather than bold, strategic leaders.

Common Pitfalls

• Saying yes too often and becoming overextended

• Avoiding risk or visibility due to fear of being seen as “too much” or “not enough”

• Being perceived as lacking executive presence due to under-communication of achievements or vision

• Remaining stuck in middle management while less experienced but more vocal peers advance

Men: The Trap of Confidence and Control

Behaviour That Helped Them Rise

Men, by contrast, are often rewarded early in their careers for confidence, decisiveness, and taking charge. From a young age, many are socialised to assert themselves, speak up, and compete. In the workplace, this translates to taking the lead on projects, speaking first in meetings, and being perceived as leadership-ready even when they’re still learning.

Ambition, boldness, and self-assurance are celebrated, especially in fast-paced or hierarchical environments. These behaviours often lead to high visibility, early promotions, and influence.

When It Starts to Hurt

At more senior levels, however, leadership is no longer about being the smartest person in the room or making the quickest decision. It’s about building alignment, developing others, fostering trust, and managing complexity. Leaders who continue to rely solely on confidence, control, and command can find themselves isolated, ineffective, or out of touch.

Rigid self-reliance can prevent collaboration. A reluctance to show vulnerability can hinder emotional intelligence. And dominating conversations can stifle innovation and disengage teams.

Common Pitfalls

• Mistaking decisiveness for wisdom, leading to poor listening and shallow collaboration

• Resisting vulnerability or feedback, leading to blind spots

• Leading through authority rather than influence, which can breed disengagement

• Undervaluing the relational and emotional dimensions of leadership

The Inflection Point: What Got You Here Won’t Get You There

Leadership at the executive level requires a pivot. It demands not just capability, but consciousness. Not just action, but presence. The most successful leaders are those who evolve their self-concept and expand their toolkit, moving beyond doing and into being.

This is the point where gendered behaviours that individuals previously relied on to succeed and advance need to be re-evaluated.

For women, this often means: 

• Letting go of the need to prove their worth through overwork 

• Speaking with bold authority, even when uncertain 

• Claiming credit and visibility for strategic impact  

• Setting clearer boundaries and saying no without guilt

For men, this often means: 

• Listening more and speaking less 

• Creating space for disagreement and co-creation 

• Admitting limitations and seeking feedback 

• Prioritizing relationships as much as results

Both women and men need to step out of the boxes that early success placed them in and embrace a new model of leadership that is more inclusive, emotionally intelligent, and future-ready.

How to Begin the Shift

If you’re a high-performing woman who feels invisible, exhausted, or stuck, or a man who senses your usual playbook is no longer landing, it’s time to evolve. Here are some practical starting points.

For Women:

• Practice strategic visibility. Share your insights and results in ways that position you as a thought leader.

• Say no and delegate. Protect your energy and make space for high-impact work.

• Embrace imperfection. Progress, not perfection, is the goal of strategic leadership.

• Own your authority. Speak up even before you feel “100% ready.”

  
  

For Men:

• Listen with curiosity. Ask open-ended questions and genuinely consider others’ perspectives.

• Invite and accept feedback. Treat it as a tool for growth, not criticism.

• Empower others. Shift from control to influence and from telling to developing.

• Show vulnerability. Authenticity builds trust far more than invulnerability.

Conclusion: Your Edge Must Evolve

In today’s dynamic, complex work environment, leadership is not about doing more of what you’ve always done. It’s about growing into a more conscious, adaptive, and self-aware version of yourself.

Whether you’re a woman who needs to claim more space or a man who needs to make more space, the shift is the same:

You must evolve.

Understanding the hidden patterns that helped you rise, and recognizing when they start to limit you, is the inflection point where real leadership begins. And from there, the possibilities for growth, influence, and impact are exponential.

Want Support Navigating the Shift?

I help high-achieving professionals unlearn the patterns that once helped them succeed, but now hold them back. If you're ready to evolve from over-functioning (women) and over-controlling (men) into clear, confident, authentic leadership, let’s talk. 

Book a FREE DISCOVERY CALL by emailing me on js@juliastewart.co.za or send me a whats app on 0836802363.

Whats App WHAT GOT YOU THERE to 0836802363 for my free guide on this topic.

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